At what point does exposure in the public eye go to a person’s head? When does the line begin to blur between perception and reality for a human being? When do these individuals begin to believe the hype?

I have to wonder about this, because as I’m sure some of you know, my role in the Sons of Pericles requires a certain amount of public exposure in the Hellenic community. So I suppose that as a designated “leader,” this topic is of concern to me. Obviously it’d be nice if I could always “keep it real,” so to speak, and not let the compliments that I receive regularly go to my head. ‘Cause that’s the point where I, or anyone else in said position, stands to lose focus, drop the ball on the big picture, and just go into business for oneself.

I understand that this one is probably coming from way outta left field for a lot of people, so allow me to explain the impetus for this entry in the Inspector’s Notebook…

Some of you may know me to be/have been a fan of pro wrestling. I use the quasi-past tense here because in recent months, the overall product has failed to engage me as it once did. To accelerate this disenchantment, I refuse to get cable in my new place for some time because I rarely have time to watch TV as it is, would rather use my spare time to partake in more creative activities, and quite frankly just am not home enough to really take advantage of it. So if I can save a few bucks a month that will go towards towering gas prices and my gym membership, so be it. Very little on TV is actually worth watching these days to begin with, but that’s a topic for a different post altogether.

The one aspect of wrestling over the past year that I have truly enjoyed is the inception of the WWE’s DVD library. For those of you who are not aware, many of the special releases are more documentary-based now, focusing on the careers of various wrestlers (Chris Benoit, Ric Flair, Eddie Guerrero, Rob Van Dam, the Road Warriors, etc.), or particular milestones in wrestling history (ECW, the “Monday Night Wars,” and the like). I find these DVD’s to be highly entertaining and informative, as it offers the more… shall we say, “enlightened” fan a deeper look into the inner workings of the business (a fascinating case study in and of itself).

Which brings me to a case study of a different sort: a psychological case study embodied in the man who wrestled as the Ultimate Warrior back in the 80’s and 90’s when it was still known as the World Wrestling Federation (WWF). Recently, a DVD entitled The Self-Destruction Of The Ultimate Warrior hit the shelves, and I had to buy it for a variety of reasons going far beyond my appreciation for the documentary aspect of this series.

First off, it brings me back to the guy that captured my attention as a 9-year-old kid way back when. For the uninitiated, the Warrior was a hulking mass of bodybuilder-turned-pro wrestler renowned for his great intensity, unique persona, and extremely limited in-ring ability. The man was distinguished by his long hair, multi-colored face paint and tassels, and his seemingly incoherent ramblings (more on that in a bit). The Warrior’s entrance was famous as his music blared through the arenas with a pulse-pounding guitar chord and heavy backbeat that saw the man sprint down to the ring, pumping his fists through the air and shaking the ropes like a savage convict behind bars. He looked like a comic book character come to life. Somewhere between He-Man and the Mighty Thor, there lay the character for the Ultimate Warrior. He resembled a postmodern barbarian with a dose of Native American influence that would go on about his destiny, the sacrifices he had made, and the power bestowed upon him by the gods above.

Yeah, the guy was out there.

But he got noticed, and to make a long story short, he went onto become the first man in years to cleanly pin Hulk Hogan at WrestleMania VI to become the WWF World Heavyweight Champion. It was a milestone since both guys were fan favorites, but also since Hulk Hogan was “the man” so to speak. It’s like when Guns N’ Roses opened for Aerosmith on the 1987 tour that saw GN'R supporting Appetite For Destruction and Aerosmith supporting Permanent Vacation. People were coming to the show for Guns and then leaving before Steven Tyler and Company could take the stage. Again, more on that later.

As I said, the Warrior was not much of an actual wrestler. He was sloppy, careless, couldn’t cut an interview to save his life, and relied too much on the character rather than learning a craft. But he still managed to rise to the top of the ladder despite the dominance of established guys like Hogan and Andre the Giant. So it was interesting to see this guy just explode out of nowhere. That is not common in the wrestling business; most competitors spend years working their way up the ladder. This guy just sped past everybody because of the character.

And ultimately (no pun intended), it would be the character that would both define and destroy the man behind the face paint: Jim Hellwig. Hellwig would come to believe his own hype, most would say… and resultant of that, he developed a massive ego in the business, and thought himself to be underpaid, underappreciated and underused. According to the DVD (which, it should be duly noted, does not feature Hellwig, as he declined to appear), his peers claim he had a bad attitude and thought a bit too highly of himself. He was fired three times from the WWF: once for refusing to work a major pay per view unless he was paid a substantial amount of money (on the very night of the show itself, no less), again for failing a drug test, and a third and final time for missing a series of shows. Hellwig disputes all these points to this day, but to me, if there are a dozen or more people supporting one story, and only one guy supporting another side of the story, I have to fall back on the majority, nine times out of ten.

But it goes way beyond all that. After his second departure from the WWF, Hellwig legally changed his name to “Warrior.” Not Jim Warrior or James Warrior Hellwig, just “Warrior.” This would be like if Cherilyn Sarkisian LaPierre legally changed her name to just “Cher.” Only much more bizarre.

Not only did he change his name, but he formulated his own philosophy based on the Ultimate Warrior character. See, since the Warrior always babbled incessantly about his destiny and the sacrifices he made, the man Jim Hellwig came to identify with the character he portrayed on TV. And because of his meteoric rise to the top of the wrestling profession, he came to accept the hype surrounding him that was only reinforced by the office and his fans. The line apparently began to blur for Hellwig, and he saw his irrational behavior as perfectly justified in keeping with the Warrior persona. In fact, he came to identify with the character so much that he sued the WWF in 1996 for the rights to the name. His rationale was that since he was now Warrior and not Jim Hellwig, and since many aspects of the character were formulated by him, he was the rightful owner of the intellectual property. This came in spite of the fact that Vince McMahon was the one who came up with the name and initial backbone of the character.

Hellwig (or “Warrior,” as he prefers, simply for the fact that I don’t want to get sued, either) went on to one more wrestling stint in WCW, which was a huge flop. He then began maintaining his own company (which is apparently a handful of close friends and his wife), posting long, rambling entries on his personal website, maintaining the precepts of his philosophy, and most recently speaking on the college circuit (specifically as it pertains to young conservatives). But Warrior has burned all of his bridges, it would seem: with the WWE, with the fans, and with the general public. He recently started a near-riot at UConn during one of his public speaking appearances.

The point of this bizarre history lesson is to illustrate how a life spent in the public eye can change a man’s view of himself, and not for the better. There’s a wrong and right way to take compliments and praise. This is definitely the wrong way.

But it’s not just my former childhood hero that has fallen victim to this syndrome. I have selected two other very public, very recognizable men who also fit the bill.

Submitted for your evaluation, one Mr. William Bailey, an Indiana native with big dreams to become a huge rock star. A well-schooled pianist and devout rock fan with an endearing love for Queen, Aerosmith and the Sex Pistols, Bailey struck out on his own with his buddy Jeff and hit up Hollywood. It wasn’t long before they got together with Saul, Mike and Steve, all of whom were in another very popular band frequenting the dives along L.A.’s Sunset Strip.

One thing led to another and it wasn’t long before William, Saul, Mike, Jeff and Steve were know as Axl, Slash, Duff, Izzy and… well, Steve. Guns N’ Roses.

Yeah, Indiana’s own William Bailey transformed himself into the charismatic yet unpredictable Axl Rose, rock n’ roll’s greatest frontman since Mick Jagger himself. As I mentioned before, when Guns opened for Aerosmith in ’87, many people were coming to check the opening act alone, leaving the headliners in the dirt come mainstage time.

As time went on, the videos got more and more grandiose, as did the stage productions and the songs. They went from the visceral, violent Appetite to the considerably more refined Illusions albums. Axl’s attitude, stage presence, temper, all went over-the-top. The down and dirty boys from L.A.’s Sunset Strip had become an over-the-top bombastic rock and roll production. Along with the bombast grew Axl’s ego, as he became even more temperamental, going so far as to storm offstage in fits of inexplicable rage and frustration. He went even further by no-showing several major shows, letting down the fans time and again.

His attitude got so out of hand that he not only alienated his fans, but his bandmates as well. Little by little, they began to bail on him, leaving him as the last original member of GN’R. Axl would go into exile for a number of years, making occasional appearances in public and onstage in the late 90’s, as well as reforming Guns.

But it wasn’t the Guns we knew. Confident that his name and his name alone could sell the product, he rounded up a group of talented, albeit obscure and out-of-place musicians to recreate Guns N’ Roses. A boorishly mediocre performance at the 2002 MTV Video Music Awards (capped by Axl’s horrid howling) was followed by a brief American tour. Many critics claimed that this would be a make-or-break moment for Axl and his lot, seeing as how the long-awaited new GN’R album, Chinese Democracy, had been in development for nearly 10 years without nary a hint of radio airplay or promotion, and no release date in sight.

The tour went swimmingly for a few weeks… until the no-shows commenced again. 10 years later, nothing changed. Axl let the fans down, the tour was cancelled, and for all intents and purposes, he has not been heard from in the last three years.

It is interesting how the people who come to believe their own hype ultimately feel a certain amount of invincibility – as if the world owes them something, and they can fuck up however much they want and still get away with it.

This brings me to our Commander-In-Chief.

Republican friends, hold thy tongues. This is my blog, my right, no apologies. No one will ever be able to convince me that this man’s incompetence and utter disregard for anything but his own hide and his bank account are a figment of my imagination.

The difference here is that James Hellwig and William Bailey tried to convince the world that they were the Ultimate Warrior and Axl Rose. In this case, Dubya is trying to convince the world that he’s really George W. Bush.

See, Dubya is the man behind the mask. Dubya is the happy-go-lucky blueblood Texan who never gave a damn about anything but himself. However, the persona he attempts to emit, the persona of George W. Bush, is who he sees himself as: a caring, compassionate President with a sterling track record of defending the nation against terrorism and improving the economy.

Balderdash.

I’ve heard recently from Canadian friends that there are claims which state the Bush administration has actually stopped several terrorist attacks over the last few years. How convenient these reports are now being broadcast when his approval rating is at an all-time low.
Face it, the man is not presidential material, people. I bit my tongue during Katrina, but to see this phony photo op shots of him holding children and weeping turns my stomach. A few cute pictures do not make a solution.

And yet, even while I displace myself from the pulpit, it is hard to say that he doesn’t believe the shit he’s shoveling. I really believe that in his mind, he is one of the finest leaders this nation has ever seen, which is why he goes to the lengths he does to convince us. I believe that in his mind’s eye, he feels we really belong in Iraq, and that he has made all the right decisions since 2001 when he was inaugurated.

I am convinced he believes his own hype… and feels vindicated for all his misgivings. I’m sure he doesn’t even consider them to be misgivings… I think he truly believes himself to be a superior leader. And yet even his once most loyal supporters have begun to turn their backs on him in recent months following Katrina and his insistance that we stay in Iraq.

And I don’t want to make this just a political thing… I’ve seen it happen on the ground level… people I’ve worked with, dealt with on a daily basis, past friends, past girlfriends, I have seen the hype go to people’s heads. I have seen them buy into the notion that they are something spectacular. A compliment is not a license to boast or brandish like a trophy.

And I have seen the end result… people who were once fun, beautiful human beings turned ugly inside-out by virtue of their own egos. Sad as it may be, it is in part human nature. We can’t help but want to be more than we are… but to believe we are something that spectacular, that godlike and monolithic is absolutely absurd. I have made it my personal mission to never let my role go to my head no matter where my lot in life is. It’s one of the reasons that I have convinced myself I can never deal with the woes of celebrity. Why would I want to alienate myself that way? Why strip myself of my humanity for the sake of my own self-gratification?

Granted, I may be working my ass off for myself these days, but that is in an effort to grow more comfortable with myself… Not to go out with a “#1” tattooed on my forehead. Believe me, I’ve gotten a heap ton of compliments regarding my work with the Sons, my writing, and the like. The key is to not let that travel northward to my cranium where it can sit, grow, and fester like a sickness.

At the end of the day, I refuse to even believe my own hype. I’ve seen the damage that does.

Goodnight, and have a pleasant tomorrow.