Recently at a family gathering, there was a comment made by one of my relatives that caused a stir with my father and I. Now, I hate being diplomatic and concealing names to protect the guilty parties, but family is a bit of a touchy subject, so you'll forgive me if I don't delve too deep into the back story.

Anyway, this comment evoked a strong reaction from Pops and I. And it wasn't a contentious thing by any stretch, but we smelled something offensive and made the unconscious joint decision to weigh in on it. It didn’t even cause an incident or anything, but my mother, being the saintly peacemaker she’s known for, kept quiet only to tell us later that we crossed the line.

However, when we asked if we were wrong, she declined to comment. Folks, as a great man once said, the phrase “no comment” is a comment. And it speaks volumes. What she was essentially saying was that she agreed with us but felt it wasn’t our place to remark on.

Now, color me crazy, but I honestly don’t feel there’s ever a “bad time” to call out bullshit. For that matter, I think it’s all the more imperative to do so in this day and age, especially when hypocrisy is factored in.

It seems sad to me that so many humans, particularly Americans, are quick to comment without all the facts and even quicker to clam up when their opinions are debunked and their ignorance is proven. I’m a big fan of taking responsibility for one’s feelings and comments, and an even bigger fan of seeing both sides of the coin. I try to do it as often as I can and even though some things will forever be black and white to me, I will still make an effort to understand the juxtaposed hue.

So when narrow minds speak loudly and tunnel vision opinions spew forth their misinformed, predisposed rhetoric, you can rest assured I will champion the cause to not only clean up the bullshit, but to put it in its place. The sad fact is that our society is not only rife with bullshit, the pot’s overflowing. To make matters worse, most people buy into it and take it for fact. Not so, folks.

Buying into and believing the bullshit is part of the reason this nation is in the rut it’s in right now, whether we realize it or not. I hate to say it, but if we did a better job as a collective of smelling the bullshit and avoiding it, we would not have elected certain leaders who have systematically run our country into the seventh circle of the Inferno.

So my honest opinion is this: when bullshit becomes apparent—and make no mistake, you never have to look long or hard before it starts wafting around—it’s important to acknowledge it and proceed with cleansing the landscape.

Now if that means you have to call someone out and challenge them, I really don’t see a problem with that. The one thing we lack in this world is honesty, now more so than I can ever recall. We live and die by euphemisms and short-sighted claims, which isn’t difficult in this 3,000-message-per-day world. It’s hard to focus in on the truth sometimes when there’s so much else that’s more appealing to blind us.

This is why it’s all the more necessary to be real and be honest. I don’t mean to be argumentative or even confrontational. In fact, I pretty much hate confrontation (funny, since I’m a blossoming MMA fan). But there’s a difference between confrontation and debate. Folks, debate is healthy for the mind. It keeps the cogs in motion and prevents the degeneration into group-think, alright? We can’t be afraid to challenge others on their opinions if we see flaws.

And more often than not, there are heavy flaws at stake. However, this isn’t to say that there are some very rational, reasonable humanoids out there who, despite a difference in opinion, may actually be fun to converse with while completely avoiding critical disagreement. Despite being a registered Democrat, I’ve found myself able to hold good discussion with diehard Republicans without getting the least bit frustrated or getting into pissing contests about minutia and personal belief.

Know why? We disagree, but we both make an effort to be informed and steer clear of the bullshit. For every point there’s a reasonable counterpoint that could make the other pause and think, “OK, I’ll give ya that.” However, I find these blessed folks to be in the single digit percentiles of the populous. Most people just rattle off whatever they please without so much as a lick of data to buttress their thoughts.

Hey, people, I’ve got news for ya: making strong claims without strong evidence is a sign of gross ignorance. And clinging to them while being debunked is a sign of a hypocritical, narrow mind. And a hypocritical, narrow mind makes you a prime candidate for prestigious purveyor of prime poo-poo. In my book, that makes you a target for cleansing.

Now I’m sure there are times, places, and yes, even people that we should avoid when it comes to our honesty. However, I don’t think we can afford to limit ourselves too much right now. We cannot fear speaking the truth if we know it.

And to all those who would go so far as to incriminate themselves, let me say this: it is better for your friends and loved ones to fill you in on being full of shit as opposed to others, so thank them for being genuine with you. Otherwise, you’re really gonna sound stupid.

God, I am so my father’s son…

Tell me if you know this guy...

You're in a public place that has several TV's around set to the news. Let's say a gym or perhaps a bar/restaurant. Suddenly, the local TV weatherman comes on and announces that your cozy little northeastern community is about to get hit with a snowstorm that could gum up your AM commute.

You're sitting there, watching this, taking it all in quietly as you plan out tomorrow in your head to avoid any sort of problems when some complete stranger turns to you and says, "So much for global warming, huh?"

I don't know about you, but I just wanna slap that guy.

Look, not to sound like a bleeding-heart liberal, because I do realize that global warming is a problem. And whether you label him as a one-man propaganda-machine or a highly visible environmentalist, Al Gore's documentary An Inconvenient Truth has brought the topic of the environment to the forefront of the public consciousness for the first time since the early 1990's when we all got those recycling bins from our local waste collection organizations.

That said, it's pretty real. It's hard to argue science. Yet there are still some nimrods who think that 2-4" of white stuff is proof positive that it's not an issue.

My response to such statements is always, "Oh really? Where's your degree in meteorology, Al Roker?" Seriously, until I see some fuckin' credentials, I'm in no mind to hear Joe Barfly wax scientific on the environment and how it's just fine. Sing that song to the people down in New Orleans and see how far you get.

I love how we as humans make generic, blanket statements like this as if we really do have it all figured out. News flash: we don't.

Doesn't matter what your stance is politically (and I say this because I'm relatively certain that one guy who actually said this to me is a staunch conservative angling for digs at Al Gore and anyone else hoping for Blue State-approval), you need to know the facts in life. I don't mean to date myself (despite only being in my late 20's), but I remember when we used to get several feet of snow, not inches. So you can take your sorry attempts at sparking conversation and stuff 'em, Jimmy Gymrat.

Don't try and be a smart-ass or a know-it-all, because you come off sounding like a putz. I can think of no better way to describe you given these circumstances. One more outburst and I'll pour sugar into your SUV's gas tank and rip your Huckabee sticker off your bumper.

Motherfuckers.

Good night and have a pleasant tomorrow.

I’ve been following this election season with particular interest. After such a long period of disdain for the current administration by most of the American public, I’m really curious to see how the nation votes.

Specifically, I want to see if there are any trends. With such a large voter turnout, I think it's important to examine certain patterns. And lo and behold, I think I found one.

This past week, in checking CNN.com following Obama’s momentous eight-in-a-row sweep, I encountered an image of Hillary Clinton perched at a podium, speaking into a microphone and holding a pair of boxing gloves high in her hands. The absurd nature of this memorable photograph is amusing to me, as there is actually something rather frightening about that image. As I told a close friend, I would rather go toe-to-toe with Floyd Mayweather.

The headline was simple: “Clinton sharpens attacks on Obama.”

This made me come back to a notion I had last month as I watched and read about Senator Clinton’s ongoing assaults on Obama’s character. I noticed that whenever the media summarized the multiple debates between the two with the term “trading barbs,” to me it seemed more like Barack Obama being forced to go on the defensive. Now in lieu of her recent string of defeats in key states, Clinton proceeds with once again unloading on her opponent.

Yet somehow, part of me feels such tactics are what got her in this predicament to begin with.

Now I don’t intend to be an official spokesperson for my generation, but I can pretty much say with a clear conscience that when I listen to candidates speak, in any political race, I want to hear what they’re going to do. I want to know what Candidate X is going to do for me… I don’t want to hear them go on and on about how Candidate Y will not live up to the hype.

The message is clear: enough of this muckraking garbage. It’s passé and offensive to me as a voter. As a marketer, I have a few ingrained notions with regard to acknowledging competition. In one course I took, the instructor specifically said that outwardly claiming your competition is inferior results in a certain cognitive twitch in consumers. The thought: “Why are they even mentioning the competition if they’re superior?”

It comes across as somewhat underhanded and disingenuous to me, and one thing I’ve learned about my generation through various studies is that today’s youth are very savvy, and can see through a lack of integrity like glass.

Think about it… you’ve seen the SuperBowl ads the last few years, right? When’s the last time Pepsi mentioned Coke in their commercials? Or can you recall Bud Light taking a swipe at Coors? This doesn’t happen anymore, and with good reason. Consumers want to be told one thing, plain and simple: “Why you,” and not “Why not them.”

I really do believe the same thing holds true for voters. If you look at the trend, Obama has been fairly consistent in promoting himself and campaigning hard. And once Hillary eased up on the attacks, he was afforded the opportunity to further promote himself rather than defend himself. Now he’s earning massive points with key demographics that Clinton herself has dominated in past primaries.

Now, stuck in a do-or-die moment, Hilldog has broken out the gloves, apparently ready for war. I wonder who among her political advisors will be the first to tell her that her haymakers could be what led her down this road to begin with. If she keeps it up, she could be the one sporting the shiner.

Oh, it’s going to be very interesting to see where this one goes.

Goodnight, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

I’m goin’ old school with this one… time to rip a page out of my everyday life and see how ridiculous life can be sometimes.

So I’m checking my mail a few weeks ago on a Monday night at the mailboxes outside my complex. As I’m doing so, a fellow resident approaches.

“Checkin’ your mail, huh?” he inquires.

“Yep,” I simply respond. There’s a silence of about 10 seconds as he does the same. Suddenly, he turns to me and issues the following statement:

“You know I’ve lived here 15 years.” This is the moment where I am forced to treat one of my fellow residents like many of us may have treated that one really disturbed or drunk homeless person you encounter on the street. I keep my head down, proceed about my business and refuse to engage/acknowledge. Kid Zippy proceeds to detail how much he likes it here and thinks it’s a good, clean place to live.

Before you go off on me for my arguably callous negligence of this man, let me offer you the following nugget to digest: Every time I have met this guy, he has told me the exact same thing. Typically of his volition, rarely provoked. In fact, just scroll up and reread that transaction. Notice the pause between the exchanges.

I wasn’t even attempting to make conversation with this man and he still felt compelled to give me his life story.

This event, coupled with my past dealings with life in the average condo complex has led me to conclude that such an environment is the perfect sampling of the American psyche. Seriously, if it takes all types, then you’ll find ‘em in an apartment complex for sure.

Here’s another example of life in the Twilight Zone: this past spring, I ordered some promotional shirts for my company. Somehow they were delivered to my home rather than my office. I didn’t even know I had a package until I got a letter from the resident in Unit 24 telling me he had a package waiting for me. Several trips to his apartment left me at a loss as there was no response despite the noise of a TV inside. A note asking him to leave the package at my door also went unaddressed. I thought little of it since it wasn’t a huge issue for the office, but then it happened again a few months later.

This time it was more personal.

See, this package happened to be for a friend of mine who had just become a daddy for the first time. So I got him and his wife a baby monitor set from Babies R' Us. Once again, the package never made it to me. It was once again accepted by the mysterious Samaritan in Unit 24.

After I found out about this through a series of twists and turns, I thoroughly chewed out UPS, then once again ventured to the eternally locked door of Unit 24. I wasn't too shy about keeping quiet with my knock. From within, I heard some kind of a grunt from someone telling me to "hold on."

When the door opened, there was a dead ringer for Samuel L. Jackson in last year's feelgood cinematic opus, Black Snake Moan. In a towel. That's right, the culprit in Unit 24 not only resembled the main character from an unforgivably bad movie, but was also in the process of cleansing himself.

I can't begin to tell you the immediate humor I saw in this.

I queried Black Snake about my packages, only giving him my unit number. He immediately nodded and took me out to the hallway, unlocking a storage room rife with untold treasures... and my packages.

Oh yeah, he went in and put on his briefs before giving me my property.

What's the point of this?

I'm not even sure, but I swear, sometimes life is a ride that throws these amazing characters at you, and you can't help but laugh. Honestly, an apartment complex is the perfect gathering point for all of them. Heck, in my building alone I live across from and above two functioning alcoholics. Then there's Kid Zippy the proud tenant, Black Snake, and I'm sure there are even more where those cats came from. I've been half-tempted to go on some sort of a safari through the inner workings of my building to see what other unique indigenous organisms I can find.

At the end of the day, I'm just here for the show. I'm putting my feet up and feasting on popcorn and soda. Encore, baby.

Goodnight, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

I have a favor to ask people... I know that Super Tuesday is upon us, and after that, the big 2008 Presidential Election. I know it's an interesting landscape that's growing more curious by the microsecond. With that said, I'm well aware that many of you fervent party members are doing your best to promote your team and see to it that we're all aware of the facts.

That said, please do me a favor: count me out.

I've had my mind made up for a while. I won't tell you what my thoughts are on the matter, because I don't have the time/energy to debate and engage right now like I did when I was 23. At least not at this stage in the game.

But I'm going to ask you as kindly as I possibly can... please spare me the forwards, the long chain letters, the endless laundry lists of bulletpoints as to why I should vote for Candidate X.

My mind is made up, I'm not a swing voter, and there is not a damn thing you can do to change it.

I think my school of thought regarding politics right now is really this: if you're unaware of what's going on, then I'm willing to share with you my feelings. If you have your mind made up, then God bless you an may the best party win.

I really no longer believe in the militant, shove-it-down-their-throats guerrilla campaigns that have become all the rage by the hardcore pundits. I respect passion to no end, but with that said, such zealousness can really be a turn-off.

I remember during the 2000 election, there was an intense Green Party presence at Skidmore College. So intense in fact, I felt like I was being force fed information at a rate quicker than I could digest. The group was so in-your-face, it led to a substantial backlash from the swing voters on campus. Myself included. It was my first presidential election as a potential voter, and not only did I not vote, I didn't even register.

You can chalk that one up to ignorance if you please, but before you judge, be sure to remember that there is a significant sample of the population who will withdraw due to frustration or disgust rather than stick it out and choose a "lesser of all evils." Case in point: my own mother didn't vote in the 2004 election for the first time in her life as a U.S. citizen. Chew on that, dear reader.

Besides, not only will you turn off people to your party, you may just turn them off to you. No one likes a hard ass.

So please think twice before you click send on that e-mail, kids. Keep thy policies to thyself.

Goodnight, and have a pleasant tomorrow.